That Girl from Derwent dwells on the value of religion this Christmas.
That Girl from Derwent has learned a few more things about prejudice since moving up North.
That Girl From Derwent reckons if you're going to be offensive, you should find a better reason.
That Girl from Derwent considers why it is that some words have wider implications than others.
If you’re not talking about Facebook, then it’s because you’re on Facebook.
If you’re not on Facebook... wait, no.
Facebook is a social network that allows you to connect with friends, acquaintances or just randomers you meet in the pub and exchange information with within minutes. You can view their biography, their relationship status and even the details of their education from the age of five with one click.
But at what point did Facebook become my personal dating site?
For those of you who have seen the film ‘The Ugly Truth’, you may be surprised to hear that there is a vaguely moral message on love pushed in between scenes of Gerard Butler being sexy. The idea is this: women aren’t looking for love: instead, they’re looking for someone who fulfils the criteria on their checklist. Some of the credentials that a man may have to have are: good looks, good job prospects and the guarantee that he is going to abandon his football match/Call of Duty session/drink with the lads to appear on your doorstep with chocolate and a rom-com the moment you ask them to (or even without asking them to!). Now many of you will be tutting indignantly at the idea that people are so shallow - and I must admit that previously, I would have agreed with you...
...that is until I found myself checking out the profile of a guy I had recently added on Facebook.
‘Wow! He likes ALL of the same books as me’, check! ‘He has Love Actually as his favourite film!’ check! ‘He used ‘they’re’ correctly on his status!’ check! And then... ‘Oh wait, he likes the Arctic Monkeys.’ Ah well, maybe next time...
Sound familiar? I think we’re all guilty of a bit of Facebook stalking now and again, but is it ruining our chances of finding someone who we’ll genuinely like?
There’s nothing more frustrating than someone with a private profile – how can I decide whether I should smile at you as we pass in the Courtyard if I don’t know whether you watch Merlin or not? We even begin to try and deduce things from the little information that their profile offers: he’s kept that bit that says he’s interested in women – does that mean that he sleeps around? He’s looking for a relationship – is he desperate? What?!
Where possible we cross-reference his interests with our own until we reach a point where if we both didn’t ‘lol at the seal’ then it just wasn’t meant to be.
But the truth is, even if by some miracle we find someone who passes the “Facebook test”, it doesn’t necessarily mean that we’re going to get along. Returning to ‘The Ugly Truth’, those of you who have seen it can’t fail to remember the scene where the female lead, having done the necessary background checks, finds herself on a date experiencing that oh-so-familiar awkward silence. Despite it appearing on paper that they were perfect for each other, in reality there’s a lot more to it than that. We can’t tell how kind someone is from their favourite book, we can’t tell how generous someone is from their hobbies and we can’t tell if that spark is going to be there just by the fact that they too, like giant strawberries.
So I think it’s time for me to get off Facebook and venture into the real world. And, you know what? The next time I meet a guy, I won’t immediately run home to search for his profile. Instead, I’ll ask him out.
So what if I don’t show up to the date knowing the last film they watched or their religious views? They can tell me over dinner; which I think you’ll agree is far more enjoyable than over the internet.
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