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My Childhood Book: Mr Majeika

Mr Majeika
Tuesday, 14th December 2010
A long time before J.K. Rowling created that annoying boy wizard and his dorky compadres which children these days can’t seem to get enough of (don’t ask me why), and an even longer time before Stephanie Meyer had the idea to make vampires sparkly and give them ultra-submissive human girlfriends, there was another series of children’s books that featured wizards, witches and whatnots – the Mr Majeika series, by Humphrey Carpenter.

Rather than transport his young readers to some unattainable magical castle in the Outer Hebrides or somewhere, Carpenter set his books firmly in the commonplace – an English primary school. When the books began, Mr Majeika was set as the new form teacher of Class Three at St Barty’s School. Being infinitely more fun than Dumbledore, he rides into his first lesson on a magic carpet, and proceeds to dazzle his young charges with one display of magic after another, at one point turning the class bully into a frog for his insolence. Sporting his trademark green suit, bow-tie, and signature goatee, Mr Majeika led the boys and girls of Class Three on many magical and astounding adventures. No hero is complete without a nemesis, however, and Mr Majeika’s took the form of a witch named Wilhelmina Warlock, who kept appearing in various guises – favourite aliases included a music teacher and a lollipop lady – to wreak general havoc at the school and, in the model of an ex-wife, make Mr Majeika’s life a misery.

The series included many tales of the extraordinary grounded in the mundane, with titles such as Mr Majeika and the School Play, Mr Majeika and the Dinner Lady, and Mr Majeika on the Internet, where, in a clear anticipation of many later science-fiction films, Mr Majeika was actually trapped on the internet. My favourite, however, remains Mr Majeika and the Haunted Hotel, wherein Mr Majeika escorts Class Three on a school trip to Hadrian’s Wall. Northern mists descend on their coach, and, becoming isolated from the other groups, Mr Majeika is forced to put in a stop at a hotel, which later turns out to be infested with unfriendly poltergeists.

The reason why these books have had such enduring appeal (for me, at least) is because they never abstracted the reader into a different world, or a world they could never access. It was the ordinary world of school dinners, plays, and field trips, just made a little bit more interesting. They also included a teacher that was every good pupil’s dream – funny, paternal, non-intimidating and infinitely exciting. (It’s also a good bet that Mr Majeika would never posthumously reveal his sexual orientation, unlike some other wizard-teacher of more recent times.) So if you’re looking for some reading this Christmas, then put down that copy of Deathly Hallows and get back to basics with good old Mr Majeika.

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