My gap year destroyed my body

I am a self-confessed gap yaaarer, and my gap yar, rather than opening my mind to the wonders of the world, just destroyed my body.

On it, I had very little cultural, educational or life changing experiences. The most ‘worthy’ things I did were to learn a bit of Spanish and Latin dancing whilst living with a Costa Rican family and go on a trek up a mountain in northern Thailand. The majority of my year was spent trying to sell green electricity to unwilling Australians on their doorsteps and more often than not quitting before midday to have far too many ‘stubbies’ in the back yard of a welcoming and usually inebriated Ozzie. I love the Australian lifestyle. In fact the friend I went travelling with still hasn’t come back. She’s staying there on a slightly dubious visa because she just can’t bear to leave the world of sun, beer and freedom. She is however, still selling electricity, an occupation that I couldn’t wait to quit. The greatest guy I met door knocking was a 70-year-old ex-biker who made his own alcohol. He had his own brand of every spirit under the sun (the hot skin-cancer causing Australian sun) and had a few intriguing cannabis related recipes up his sleeve. He also wore a knuckle buster in the shape of a fist and had no front teeth… As much as I love the backpacker Australian lifestyle of drinking, drinking and more drinking it is not healthy, nor sustainable. I came back weighing a stone more than when I left and in a grand of debt. I managed to pay back the debt but now nearly a year on, I still haven’t shed the extra 14 pounds.

University hasn’t helped; although I eat well I’ve kept up the drinking and apart from the odd bike ride do no exercise. I went home last weekend and made a pact with my 35-year-old sister. She is understandably a little overweight, and having had a baby just a year ago, she’s got an excuse. We are about to begin the monstrous task of attempting to lose a stone in two months; I just have to have that ‘bikini body’ in time for summer. We’ve added a bit of friendly competition to the challenge. Whoever sheds the weight first, and sustains it, wins a mystery prize from Mum.

The thing that really convinced me that the time has most definitely come, and came a long time ago, to try and get back to my normal size, was whilst shopping in Primark. Standing in the Primark changing room, trying on dress after dress (in a size that is admittedly one bigger than ‘normal’) my mum was sat there with her head at an angle peering at me over her short distance glasses. At first I thought she was checking out the hideous bruise on my left arm - thank you, Salvation, covering the floor with popcorn is clearly the best idea a club has ever had - but then she came out with it, apparently I’d look ‘much better if I lost a few pounds’ in every item I tried on. Cheers, Mum. Just to clarify, my Mum is not condoning severe dieting, she’d just like me to cut back on the drinking - she did in fact also comment on the bruise.

So, my sister, having already started Weightwatchers, and I made our pact. I’m not going to try Weightwatchers again. I ended up spending £40 on it at the beginning of first term. I lost four pounds in two weeks and then rediscovered beer. My choice of alcohol is the major problem here. I have made a pledge to cut out lager and cider from my diet. From now on I am a vodka and diet coke girl.

Exercise I believe is the other key to my success, so yesterday I went on my first run. This was a fairly hilarious event accompanied by two flatmates. We ran to 22 acres from Langwith, around the field a bit, ran through Halifax, smelling the sweet smell of burning meat on BBQs as we went, ended up in what appeared to be a dead end, climbed through a bush, ran down a dirt track and out panting on the road again. I tried to use my recently diagnosed asthma as an excuse, but lets face it, I’m just shockingly unfit. It was embarrassingly exhausting for us all and today my legs feel like two lead weights. At 20 aren’t we meant to be at our physical prime?

The race to lose 14 pounds has begun, I’m cutting out the calorific drinks, eating smaller, healthier portions, and have a run scheduled for 5.30pm today. And I will not shall not, not never ever go to Oki’s for a post Willow snack. I promise!

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