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Pre-drinking for me comes as naturally as carrying condoms – I always do it. Last week’s High School Musical social was no exception. I made some “We’re all Boozers in this Together” punch, hitting ten units before the social had even started. A few Wetherspoons mixers later, my memory stops.
I drank a lot that night. I know this because of an ingenious system invented by the Romans. Well, they probably didn’t use roman numerals the way I do, but it’s still down to them. Every time I consume a unit of alcohol, my friend draws a line on my arm, and I do the same for her. This tally is our means of competing against each other, measuring who can drink the most without passing out.
My tally was 18. Not much you say? Bearing in mind I’m both short and a girl, that’s quite a lot. Actually that’s too much. I don’t remember going into Gallery, or leaving it. Judging by my text messages, I left the Willow at ten, the next thing I know I was waking up the next morning in someone else’s bed. Anyone with information for me let me know!
Before you all shout rape, it was a girl’s bed that I woke up in. A devoted second year friend had seen me being kicked out of Gallery and had brought me home with her. No harm done? Not quite.
Being too drunk to remember can be the best excuse ever. However, there’s a line between forgetting that your best mate asked you to stay away from her crush, and forgetting what happened over several hours. I am personally very scared as to what happened to me that night.
Even more worrying is what could’ve happened if that friend hadn’t shown up. I’ve heard stories of ‘the girl whose drink got spiked in the Duchess’ or ‘the girl who almost got attacked on her way to Halifax’. I couldn’t believe I’d knowingly put myself into that situation. Even Mademoiselle has limits; getting paralytically drunk being one of them. Besides, what’s the point of having sex when you won’t even remember it the next day?
So I am replacing my tally system with another system. No more righteous, but much less harmful. A boy tally! So if you see a girl in Ziggy’s tonight with a growing tally on her arm, you’ve uncovered Mademoiselle, or one of her many groupies.
On another note regarding the 10 Hidden Secrets of York, I did them all and they were great, thanks boys. Just a heads up, careful about Central Hall, make it quick to avoid disturbances. Woops!
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