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“My disposals in this boardroom get taken away at the end in the back of a taxi.”
Lord Sugar has built an entire career around selling rubbish, so it was no surprise this week when he decided to see if his business-partners-to-be could do the same.
Sugar challenged his teams to set up a junk removal business, making as much money as possible from collecting garbage and selling on any valuable scrap. Helen, who was yet to lose a task, offered to lead the hapless Team Logic, whilst Zoe, bored of her team’s indecision, took charge of Team Venture for the second time. It seems Zoe thinks she’s leadership material, even if no-one else does.
It quickly became apparent that neither team knew quite what they were doing. Lord Sugar tried to help the teams by tipping them off about two businesses that needed rubbish taken away. Team Logic tentatively gave both companies a quote for their removal services, much to Melody’s bemusement: ‘Our quote...is zero?’ she ruminated.
Over with Team Venture, Susan wanted a similarly competitive price of nothing, but Zoe kept ignoring the suggestions of her young team-mate. Zoe’s know-it-all attitude saw her team end the day with no contracts and facing an uphill struggle the next day. ‘We’ve messed it all up,’ a tearful Zoe confessed in her drippiest tones. Luckily Glenn, made of sterner stuff, was on hand to rally the troops: ‘When the chips are down, that’s when you have to step it up’ he urged, showcasing Churchill-esque knack for rhetoric, ‘we absolutely have to smash it tomorrow.’
In fairness, the contest turned out to be incredibly close. Zoe and her team completed a job in a plumber’s yard that saw them gifted several lucrative copper boilers. Helen’s team, meanwhile, struggled to fulfil their contracted collections as well as another job they had found clearing a builder’s front garden. It didn’t help that the cheeky builder had snuck more rubbish onto the pile between their visits. Jim’s Irish charm was no match for the Cockney’s cunning though, and the team had to begrudgingly clear the extra rubbish.
Ultimately, back in the boardroom, it came down to a measly £6, as Team Logic outperformed Team Venture by £712 to £706. This gave team leader Helen her sixth win, whilst her team-mate Tom had his first taste of victory. I really like Tom, who has business smarts and integrity. I just hope he’s not too nice to not go further in the competition. He also needs to show he can lead a team.
Back in the boardroom, Zoe and her team were in the firing line. It was no surprise when catty Zoe brought back Edna and her long-time nemesis, Susan. ‘I never want to work with Zoe again’ Susan scathed in an earlier aside. However, while Zoe and Susan were trading petty insults, Lord Sugar seemed to have Edna in his crosshairs.
Once the big boss starts waving your CV in your face, you know your days on The Apprentice are numbered. I have found Edna less intolerable as the series has progressed, but as soon as she started spouting about her MBA in innovation and entrepreneurship, she was an obvious goner. Lord Sugar doesn’t care for qualifications and poncy letters after your name (unless they’re bestowed by the Queen) - he attended the University of Life.
So Edna was the latest candidate to be dumped by Lord Sugar. As the series moves into its second half, this was a nice and (slightly) different episode. Hopefully The Apprentice can maintain this week’s standard, whilst dropping all the rubbish gags next week.
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