Faye Priestley has rounded up the last of the sales bargains for guys
Introducing Modern Man's new columnist, who goes by the name of John Smith...
Nathan Blades shares his tips for successful Christmas shopping
Guys, do you think you are one? Ladies, would you date one?
So the run up to Christmas is by nature a bit of a nightmare scenario, traipsing round the shops in an endless cycle of trying to find something nice for people, whether that be family, friends or a girlfriend. Yet whenever I go to start my Christmas shopping there is a certain inevitability about the fact that I will never find this elusive gift and will have to resort to the “here’s that Take That CD you never said you wanted Mum” approach.
So you can imagine my shock horror when my housemate came bouncing through the door the other day with bagfuls of shopping and gleefully announced that she had a great day doing all her Christmas shopping. I couldn’t believe it. How could anyone possibly have a great day doing Christmas shopping? It’s horrendous at the best of times, I tried to point out to her. Of course she was having none of it and proceeded to show me all the wonderfully unique gifts that she had managed to find to give to people as Christmas presents.
It was at that point when I decided that maybe I’d been going about this all wrong. Maybe there were these great gifts out there that I hadn’t managed to find. So I went back to town last weekend hell bent on a Christmas shopping mission. This was it. This was the day that I was going to get everything that I had to get. It was going to be simple and easy. I would go into town, buy presents and stop for a £1 sandwich on the way home to get back just in time for the football results. Surely a piece of cake (I did buy that as well come to think of it)?
Well not quite. See unfortunately I’d forgotten one crucially important thing in my grand plan, and that is that blokes don’t know how to shop. We are genetically useless, especially when it comes to buying for the opposite sex. You can only exhaust jewellery for so long until it becomes predictable, and there’s only so many times I can walk around Accessorize before accepting that I never know what to pick and when I do pick something it will happily find its way back to the shop sometime in the new year. I was looking for a housemate’s birthday present a few weeks ago and was told by a shop assistant in Accessorize that I “looked a little lost” and “was I ok”? That about sums it up.
But of course we are all working towards that Christmas Day deadline, and unless something changes between now and then I can pretty much see the crowds of panic stricken guys wandering round the shops the week before Christmas looking as lost as ever! Honestly, if they reinvented Santa tomorrow, I’m sure a girl would be much better. He must have an absolute nightmare if he’s anything like most lads I know!
Uhm, what? My friend, knowing how to go shopping is hardly gendered. If you're so keen on enforcing gender stereotypes on something like this, dudes are supposed to be good planners. If you know someone well enough that you actually want to buy them a gift, you're going to be able to answer a bunch of basic questions - what hobbies do they have? What colours do they normally wear? Is there an author/artist/genre they follow? Do they have a hobby that requires some kind of equipment?
Armed with that knowledge, an hour's pre-planning on the internet does wonders. Aside from every blog and magazine that reviews merchandise having a Christmas shopping suggestions list, ordering online will save you the standing around and looking lost. If you don't have that knowledge, then... maybe you don't need to buy them something. If you absolutely have to, then asking them is also entirely fine and A Very Good Idea.
If you're not a fan of the process of physically going to shops and searching for things, that's cool. A lot of people hate it, it's why e-commerce exists. But it's not a guy/girl thing.
To some extent, I think the idea of shopping in general appeals more to females, and this in turn is carried over to the notion of gift shopping, hence why women are perceived to be more keen and successful at buying gifts than men.
No, no please don't go down this road. Save me the migraine.
Obviously this week is gender issues week. I really hope Anon #2 is a joke.
Lifestyle are always looking for more contributors to 'Modern Man', so if anyone, male or female, wants to share their own views on this or anything else related to the concept of the Modern Man, articles are very welcome.
comment deleted by the author Apologies for the deleted comment above, I didn't realise that Aimee had left herself logged in on my computer when I was writing it! Anyway, my comment follows (under the right name this time):
I suspect the author like myself falls into the category of a large number men who are useless at buying presents and I suspect that's what he's talking about. It's not about all men, it's about men who can't buy presents (why he uses the term "most lads", I suspect).
The problem is that most things in theory are very simple, Nathan's guide illustrated just that for shopping. Changing the oil on my car is also apparently very simple, but as I have absolutely no interest in how to do it whatsoever, I have to ring my father every time. I have the same problem with shopping, I'd need to read Nathan's (admittedly brilliant) guide every time I wanted to go shopping. Because I have no interest in shopping, I simply won't keep the information in my brain. I also know a lot of men who suffer the same problem.
P.S. Nathan, can I give you money to buy me a present please, I suspect you might actually spend it on something better than what I would have bought for myself?
Yes, I would most likely spend it on myself.
^ like
I enjoy shopping and I have bought all but two presents already, and know what I'm getting. Don't know what all the fuss is about: you're a failure at shopping and are trying to blame your gender, when it's not XY's fault 
Nathan, since when are men supposed to be good planners? 70-80% of the males I know couldn't plan their way out of a bathtub. I think that's more an age than gender thing.
On a purely anecdotal level, a lot of women (obviously not all) do seem to treat shopping as some kind of leisure activity. I know of no men who do this. (FYI, stereotypes exist for a reason - there's usually an element of truth in them.)
YES Anonymous 10 I completely agree and was about to say exactly what you said - it's not necessarily sexist to say that 'most guys' behave a certain way and 'most girls' do too. Obviously there are people who don't fit the stereotype but in general, the traditional gender roles pervade. You can't always argue that men and women are exactly the same, because they're not (and if they were it wouldn't be good at all). At the end of the day it doesn't really matter anyway, Christmas shopping is a nightmare for everyone!
Yes, obviously our biological differences affect shopping; oestrogen causes shopping addiction: fact.
In reality, most people of both genders act in the same way on most issues - and any tiny differences are blown out of proportion to try and say 'what women do' and 'what men do'. Stereotypes are based on truths, but stereotypes aren't truths. Lots of guys enjoy shopping and lots of girls hate it, lots of guys are bad with money and lots of girls are thrifty. Saying 'most' without any evidence is just silly
You must log in to submit a comment.
Report