Harriet Jean Evans takes a look at the social commentary of the past, and explains why she believes it just doesn't matter.
Our anonymous blogger reflects on her attempts to have a student Christmas... and how she came to the conclusion that home-made is always best.
Gillian Love urges you to vote 'No' to the motion to replace Women's Committee with a 'Gender Equality Committee'.
To any student looking forward to the Christmas festivities, I’m afraid there is bad news – they’ve been banned. It a statement released today, the University expressed its “sincere regret” at the action which has been taken on the grounds of “fire safety.” The decision comes on the back of increasing concern in recent days about student bought decorations being displayed in communal kitchens. In particular the use of fairy lights on Christmas trees were seen as “potentially life threatening” since they have not been “tested in accordance with the ‘Electronic Devices in Student Accommodation Act 2004’" and Heslington Hall could not be sure that they would not be subject to “spontaneous combustion.” When pressed by The Yorker to give details of the last time “spontaneous combustion” of fairy lights had in fact occurred the University said that there had been numerous instances during the past few years but declined to elaborate further.
The statement also warned that students found flaunting the ban would be subject to sanctions, including fines and that security officials have been hired to patrol accommodation blocks throughout December. The cost of these officials is said to have “no relation” to another recent announcement, that from next year accommodation prices are to be raised 600%. According to sources, in order to discourage decorations from being purchased over the Internet, the University has also teamed up with online websites to covertly switch people’s purchases for ones deemed more ‘suitable.’ One student we spoke to revealed that after ordering a tree online, she was “shocked” to receive delivery of four ghastly looking, two foot tall tree models consisting of wire wrapped in black tape and “headache inducing” neon lights.
Not totally devoid of Christmas spirit however, the University has declared other ways for students to enjoy the festivities, offering university endorsed trees, complete with lights having undergone extensive electrical testing by approved engineers, and fireproof tinsel all for the very reasonable price of £45. To get your hands on one just go down to the Christmas Fair next week (entrance £5) and make use of the free delivery service (excluding £5 charge for admin and labour costs). With all this it should be possible for all students to enjoy Christmas in a “responsible, safe manner.”
I also believe christmas caroling has been banned on health & safety grounds since, as we all know, windows are often broken by singing and shattered glass is a real safety concern.
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