The magic of kids' spooky TV shows

Looking back at children's television, it used to be Hallowe’en all year round. “Magic roundabouts and pink hippos are booooooring!” declared sadistic TV producers of the 90s. “Let’s make kids pee their pants before it’s even bedtime! Bwahahahahaha!” If disembodied hands, talking cats and nightmares about demon headmasters weren’t a large part of your childhood, then you were cruelly, horrifically deprived. Kids these days just don’t know how good it was. Remember these examples of spooky old-school telly?

• The Obvious

The Addams Family

Yes, the Addams family may have not have been the best next-door neighbours, but what’s not to love about a family run by a mother who seems to glide around on tentacles, and a father who has the greatest ‘tache ever? If only there was a way to stop your fingers involuntarily clicking every time some annoying idiot reminds you of the theme-tune.

• The Retro

Scooby Doo

Yoiks, Scoob! Do you, like, remember how scared we were of, like, every monster, even though, like, every episode ended the same way? Evidently the forerunner to shows such as Jonathan Creek and Midsomer Murders, trouble seemed to turn up wherever those pesky kids and their Mystery Machine went. Scooby Doo did, however, teach children to think twice before staying the night at an abandoned fairground.

See also: The Trap Door, Count Duckula

• The Cool

Sabrina the Teenage Witch

Up until the age of, erm, well, fairly old, to be honest, I wanted to be Sabrina the Teenage Witch. She lived with two mad aunts. She had a talking cat. She could change her clothes by pointing at herself. Sabrina was the pinnacle of coolness (even if the college episodes weren’t that great). Sadly, at the age of sixteen, I did not discover any magicical powers, but that doesn’t stop me from keeping an eye on the toaster in the mornings, just in case the post pops up.

See also: Teenage Werewolf

• The Adorably Cute

The Worst Witch

Meet Mildred Hubble, the worst witch at Cackle’s Academy (as if anybody would want to go to Hogwarts). Every week we delighted as Mildred messed up (usually by just being plain stupid) and spent the following 20 minutes moping around and moaning that everyone hated her in her extraordinarily excruciating voice… before putting everything right and learning a jolly valuable lesson. Aww.

See also: Mona the Vampire. YAY, MONA!

• The Bloomin’ Creepy

The Demon Headmaster

Is this or is this not the scariest TV show ever? I literally could barely bring myself to watch it until I was about 12. I suppose I was just always afraid that the show’s events (headmaster of satanic origin hypnotises frightfully posh kids into being well behaved) would happen in my own life, despite the fact that I didn’t have a headmaster or know anybody that was that posh. Seriously, do not watch this alone. (Or at all if you can’t bear how typically 90s everything is.)

See also: Grizzly Tales for Gruesome Kids; Are You Afraid of the Dark?

And finally, something that’s simply awesome. Happy Hallowe’en!

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