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BBC3 currently walks a wobbly, neon-pink tightrope when it comes to its real-life programme content: one minute the channel tips into the trashy point-and-lol category, then it swings back into touching, genuinely moving stories (see Sam and Evan: From girls to men). You would hope that Skin Deep: The Business of Beauty – a documentary about beauty treatments gone wrong – fits into the latter, but considering it followed Snog Marry Avoid on Monday, that tightrope was looking very unsafe indeed…
The introduction to the first victim does not bode well: “Yemzi wanted her hair done on a student budget, so she went to the capital to get a good deal.” Alas, poor Yemzi soon realises that London doesn’t equate to quality, and is left with a bleeding, weeping scalp and an understandably deep mistrust of hairdressers. Despite her eager efforts, presenter Jessica-Jane Clement isn’t helping matters, practically swooshing her mane of glossy locks right in the teenager’s face when they meet. “Can I have a look?” Clement asks about the scalp. “Arrrrgh, it looks really scarred!!!” she then squeals, clearly not pinning her hopes on winning a counselling award any time soon.
Perhaps someone should have had a chat with the producer when it came to the soundtrack: Yemzi’s devastation at being told her hair would never properly grow back is horribly undermined by the synthy club music pumping away in the background. Zero sensitivity points, guys.
It would be nice to say that Rosie, on the receiving end of an imbedded dermal anchor, fares better from the programme. (Dermal piercings, for the uninitiated, involve wriggling a small metal bar under the skin, then screwing a gem on the top. Having too many gives the rather bizarre impression that the limbs are attached with split pins.) But numerous images of Rosie’s infected hand where salon employees had tried to dig out the bar when it became “lost” under the skin are not easy viewing. Neither is the demonstration of the correct procedure, carried out by a trusted professional i.e. a scary-looking chap with loads of tattoos.
The wriggling doesn’t stop there, as the managers of the salons are confronted on camera and worm their way out of the blame. It was the client's fault for sleeping on it, her fault for not going back sooner, and that’s that. It’s so dispiriting to see these women receive nothing for their trauma other than a reluctant apology and some free vouchers for more of the same. Rather than simply “having a word” with the managers of these institutions, Ms Clement and her enviable hair would have done better to find out why Yemzi and Rosie knew nothing about the dangers beforehand.
Skin Deep seems to be totally lacking in useful advice, so what can you learn from this? 1) Don’t get piercings. Ever. Unless skin the colour and texture of corned beef does it for you. And 2) if do you have to get one, make sure it’s done by one of the Mitchell brothers. The more tattoos, the better.
Skin Deep continues on BBC3 next Monday at 8.30pm. Do not watch whilst eating dinner.
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