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If you’re sad like me, then the release of the Christmas TV schedules is one of the highlights of the year. While it’s not quite time to start queuing for the Radio Times, the BBC have provided details of the top programmes and films coming our way at the end of the year! OK, so one of the top films is Armageddon, and the chances of anyone not having seen it at least three times are about the same as Bruce Willis being sent to the moon to save the planet, but, elsewhere, it looks like we’re in for a very merry Christmas indeed.
Of course, nothing marks a BBC Christmas better than new adaptations of heavily adapted books. And while the prospect of a new version of Great Expectations doesn’t exactly instil great expectations (least of all one with Ray Winstone in it), we’ve also got the thrilling prospect of a new version of The Borrowers, starring Christopher Eccleston! And Victoria Wood!! And Stephen Fry!!! [Insert corny comment about big drama and little people here.]
Mr Fry is also to be found in the brilliantly titled The Bleak Old Shop of Stuff, along with Mitchell and Webb (because Webb can’t do anything without Mitchell unless it’s about continuity errors), and the marvellous Celia Imrie and Katherine Parkinson. Little has been disclosed about it but, unsurprisingly, it’s a Dickens rip-off, as well as the second most exciting part of the schedules. But what’s the most exciting?
Well, it’s the two new episodes of Absolutely Fabulous. I know that Christmas specials, especially ones where the show’s been off air for a few years, are considerably more miss than hit, but that doesn’t stop me being hopelessly excited. If you’re not longing to see Patsy and Bubble again, then you should probably go out and buy some humbugs.
AbFab is just one of the comedies to get a Christmas outing, though, with Rev (I wonder what the plot will be…), Mrs Brown’s Boys and Outnumbered filling the sitcom stocking. It is, what I call, a shame, however, that neither Miranda nor The Royle Family will be on our screens, despite many reports to suggest otherwise.
It also just wouldn’t be Christmas without some new comedy dramas. David Jason will star in The Royal Bodyguard which, because it’s a comedy drama being shown at Christmas, already induces wariness, while Sue Johnston stars in Lapland, a prospect that reopens the all-too-recently-healed wounds left by Sugartown.
Elsewhere, there’s the now traditional Top Gear special; this year they’re going to India, and we can expect the same level of spontaneity as there was at the Royal Wedding.
Finally, as if you didn’t know, there will be a new edition of Doctor Who, titled ‘The Doctor, the Widow and the Wardrobe’ (see what they’ve done there?). Yes, the premise is promising, and yes, the trailer looks good, but it always is and they always do, yet, generally, the specials themselves are varying levels of pants. And pants aren’t cool, by the way. Neither is Matt Smith, who persists in lowering the quality of every episode he appears in because he emotes as well as the eponymous wardrobe.
So, to wrap up, this Christmas, despite some shows that already scream turkey, looks set to be a cracker. And I, for one, don’t wanna miss a thing.
Video: BBC
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