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There were no seats left, and you might have thought that my own position, near the front of the bus, as well as my apparent greater ability to stand up, what with me being a member of the ‘stronger sex‘, may have led me to offer my seat to this suffering stranger. I say to you now that I did no such thing.
This was not due to selfishness - I would willingly give up my seat for someone incapable of standing, or perhaps a good-looking younger lady - or even my own tiredness, because I had been in town for only an hour and had bought nothing. In a split second I imagined the possible alternative scenarios if I were to do the selfless thing, and, quite sensibly I think, decided to keep my (slightly) comfortable seat.
Scenario 1: The lady is grateful for the offer, calls me a “nice young man” and sits down. I, meanwhile, stand in her place, clinging on for dear life as the bus turns a tight corner. A child in the pushchair swings her legs incessantly against my ankles and the bloke next to me is listening to frankly awful Hip Hop, but the woman is comfortable and I complete the journey home with a warm glow, knowing that I have the ability to make someone’s day better. I am a gentleman.
Scenario 2: She is thoroughly offended that I consider her to be “an old biddy”. She still has plenty of life in her, apparently, and paid full whack for the bus. Just because she is greying slightly on top and doesn’t have a chest to rival “Miss New Boobs”, who her husband left her for, does not mean that she isn’t capable of standing up on public transport. I skulk back to my seat, having been put in my place, and spend the rest of the trip home listening to her complain to another woman of a similar age about how women are seen as being past it once they leave their twenties. She refuses to be put on the shelf. I am rude and fickle.
Scenario 3: The woman is an arch-feminist, and, while attacking me with a Marks and Spencer’s carrier bag, she accuses me of having a superiority complex and of objectifying and subjecting women for hundreds of years. Finding this slightly harsh and suffering from the constant blows of the shopping, I attempt to defend myself, without much success, partly because she is stronger than me, but mostly because by now she is screaming, evidently seeing me as the embodiment of my gender: belittling, restricting and assaulting women at every turn. I am restrained by another passenger, who threatens to call the police, and thrown off the bus. I walk home in the rain, with the woman’s piercing scream ringing in my ears. I am a chauvinist and a bigot.
By my reckoning, combined with clearly ridiculous scenarios such as me falling over while standing up or the lady deciding that she’d rather not risk catching whatever I had by sitting in my seat, that is at best a one in three chance of my humane action ending well for me. I put my headphones in and spend the rest of the short journey trying to avoid the recriminating eyes of my weary fellow passenger.
Giving up your seat to someone who is 'weary-looking' and 'laden with shopping bags' is not likely to raise any eyebrows, let alone any 'arch-feminist' screeches... next time, I would advise you go for Option One. If she does screech, at least you'll be in the right.
Last year I travelled on the bus a lot whilst heavily pregnant. I'm pleased to say people frequently gave up a seat for me and I was nothing but grateful. It was a bit embarrassing when it was someone who I would normally have given up a seat for though. Just do it, you're in the right whatever happens.
All I'm saying is, we all paid the same amount, why get on a busy bus if you can't stand properly, its there fault. To truly rub it in nod your head to the music and smile at her 
option 1 is better, isn't it? probably, you wouldn't write this article... if you gave a seat.
I find it ridiculous that men try to excuse their lack of chivalry - or just general politeness - by citing the fact that women nowadays might react aggressively to simple actions like giving up a seat to a pregnant lady.
Cowards!
What ever! I have been shouted at for holding a door open for a woman going into Biology 'Are you only opening the door because im a woman' ... no i generally would for men or women.
You could wait for them to ask for the seat but it could be a trick preceding an oldie/feminist rant. No, I'm afraid the only solution is to never sit down on public transport.
People like you are the reason why First feel the need to put up patronising signs reminding us to give up seats for those who may need them more.Would you have given up your seat for a pregnant woman or a very elderly passenger? If you're worried you're going to get an earful for being polite from someone you're never going to see again anyway, more fool you.
I once gave up my seat on the tube for a pregnant woman, the reply was something along the lines of
"F*uck you. do you not fink my legs work or somefink?"
Similarly on the bus past the hospital the other day i witnessed a young man give up a seat for an elderly woman, only to be scorned by her for his effort.
People (feminists in particular) are too afraid of nice people these days. In the eyes of feminists by nature of being a man, you are always wrong.
[/irritation]
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