Straight Talking

The art of textual seduction - the alpha female way

Lots of girls (including myself before my enlightenment) like to complicate matters unnecessarily when it comes to the art of seduction. I mean, when you’re in a full blown relationship, it’s fine to be a little demanding, emotional and kind of complicated because it comes with the girlfriend territory – your man just deals with it.

However, when things are still in the early stages, why get tangled up in all the politics? Who needs the hassle of proof reading a text message three times before you send it, or contemplating how many kisses on the end of a text counts as too desperate? Or, even worse, timing your text so that you’re not replying too soon? After all, you don’t want to look like you have nothing better to do, at the same time as not wanting to leave it too long, just in case he’s put off. I am convinced that only the female sex can go through this over analytical thought process in record time and not go absolutely crazy. But fear not ladies, I was once one of these girls, and I’ve now discovered an easier way to get things done.

The flirty banter of text talking gets tangled up in endless to-ing and fro-ing between two people who want to make a good impression, but don’t want to admit that they just want some action. My approach to this situation is to just say what you mean. I mean, obviously engage in the texting pleasantries to get things moving, but don’t be afraid to make the first flirty move.

In my experience, guys have responded more positively to me admitting that I wanted to kiss them, than if I was to be all shy about it and never venture into “scandalous” territory. And don’t worry about coming on too strong; as long as you're not sending X-rated messages at this stage, you won’t scare him off. He’ll probably be thankful that you’ve broken the ice and it will save a lot of potential confusion.

You see, guys are simple creatures. They see the world as divided into Playstation and food. So when he doesn’t text you back because he was busy playing Street Racer (or Street Fighter…or whatever it is), blame it on his inability to multi-task and don’t take it personally.

If you know what you want then don’t be afraid to let him know. I once told a guy to “stop beating around every bush in Kingsbury” (my local area back home), and to basically get on with what he was trying to say. That’s when he admitted to wanting me, and god knows how long that would have taken to say had I not taken the initiative. Needless to say, from then on we could both enjoy our flirty text message exchanges without having to worry about offending/scaring off the other person. This, I found, was a lot more fun than sitting around waiting to decode and analyse his next text, and I’m sure it cleared up a few things for him too. It was, quite simply, a win-win situation.

Thus ladies, this is a tried and tested method of getting the ball rolling with a relationship. It's worked for me numerous times when I have lost patience with texting courtship. So next time you’re anxiously awaiting his reply and tearing your hair out in frustration, save yourself a lot of hassle and tell it to him straight. What’s the worst that could happen?

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