The ‘Real’ Casanova

Who is the real man behind the mask?

It wasn’t so long ago we were graced with Casanova’s chauvinist drawl on the pages of ‘Lifestyle’. Some of you hated him, others found him amusing, and a few of you even agreed with the man. He was the epitome of the brash, good looking gent that the ladies love and love to hate. You saw through the allure of VK’s and Davidoff aftershave as he bravely put down his triumphs, tribulations and failures in writing. I respect him for that and he will always have a special place in Lifestyle's ‘Alpha male’. That said, the man was ignorant at the best of times, and plain insulting the rest. So, is this status of ‘Alpha male’ all it’s cracked up to be? Should we all stand in awe as Casanova cruises up to the bar and smoothly charms a girl out of her dress and into his bed?

The idea of an ‘Alpha male’ is an interesting one and I would hardly count ‘Casanova’ as a true representation of the trait. After having several conversations with the man, ranging from metro sexuality to his girl count, I realized that I wasn’t talking to someone who understood the concept of downplaying talent. The brash tactic of rushing in for the sacred ‘shag’ on the night lost him ‘Mademoiselle’. He was shunned and hasn’t been heard of since. An ego bruised beyond repair? It’s possible. Since writing for The Yorker I’ve tried to bring the alternative side to this column, a more comfortable, respectable side to ‘Alpha male’. I wanted to show that you don’t need to go out on the premise of sexual satisfaction every night to succeed with women.

I’m not a beta male and I’ve never felt the need to scream and shout in a club whilst vying for a girl’s affections. I don’t need an arrow over my head with directions to my room and a spare VK in hand. It’s your attitude toward the fairer sex that gives an impression; move too fast and you are going to be left out in the cold when it comes to the crunch. Casanova, whilst generally successful in bedding women still has his setbacks, mainly due to his inability control the situation. He may have 6 girls in one week but immediately, if one begins to show more of an interest in him than just his anatomy, he runs a mile. A true ‘Alpha male’ would remain relaxed in all situations. He doesn’t need to try hard to get what he wants, he leads her where he wants to go, if she becomes too interested, he doesn’t make a b-line for the next piece of skirt that flutters past him. He gives it space, remains clear and keeps her curious.

Tom Jackson, Casanova’s predecessor, was all for the ‘bullying’ tactic when coming up against another ‘Alpha male’. I would have personally enjoyed watching the two pitted against each other at Ziggy’s. The two are fantastic stereotypes of this self-named section. Both would fight their corner in a vain attempt to convince the other of their worthiness. They have terrible attitudes toward women which fail to attain anymore than a glimpse at the true ‘Alpha male’.

The real ‘Alpha male’ is a man to be reckoned with; he doesn’t do it for an ego-trip, he doesn’t do it for another mark on his headboard, he does it because regardless of what they do he still enjoys their company. He’s thoughtful, intelligent, and funny – he doesn’t need to buy drinks, they are bought for him. Here is a man who has already worked his charm before it even comes to the club; he works a day shift too. To be truly ‘Alpha male’ he puts aside being macho in favor of a natural allure, he goes for the sober girls, the hard-to-gets; the women who don’t need to expose themselves in public to get their man.

So, you may ask, where is the ‘real’ Casanova? I think I saw him once, leaving quietly by the back door, a stunning girl on each arm, smiling at the irony of it all...

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