The Guy's Guide to Girls - Looks Aren't Everything

Never fear if you don't look like Brad Pitt

I’ve had a few guys comment to me that I can punch above my weight. This always makes me smile. I mostly try and keep ego to a minimum but it means I must be doing at least something right. But on the other hand, it frustrates me that so many guys think like this, and let it hold them back. Any sort of idea like, she’s out of my league, is so in your head. Seriously, it’s so in your head it’s not even funny. Stop putting beautiful girls on a pedestal. They’re just people, living, breathing, pooping, bundles of cells just like you.

I don’t want to say that looks don’t come into the equation at all. If you’re looking good, maybe wearing new clothes, then you may be feeling more confident which definitely makes a difference. Similarly if you’ve been working hard at the gym and know you look good you’re more likely to have a stronger sense of entitlement. But the point is, you can have both the confidence and the sense of entitlement without looking that great, just give yourself permission to be a guy that dates good looking women.

I still think you should always try to look your best. I go the gym regularly because it’s a healthy habit to develop; it makes you feel great and gives you loads of energy. I also think it’s cool to be able to lift heavy stuff, that’s just a guy thing though. Paying attention to fashion and working on your style is also an awesome thing to do. What I want you to get out of this article though is that you shouldn’t feel like you have to do all these things. Doing them for yourself is great but don’t do them because you feel the need to impress people.

There are actually a few advantages to not being great-looking. Without sounding sleazy, there’s definitely something to the idea of ‘coming in under the radar’. Also, to me, there’s something more impressive about a guy whose really confident but isn’t the greatest looking. It means his confidence comes from a place of genuine self-esteem and not just because he thinks he’s good-looking.

If you’re reading this coming up with counter-examples of all your good-looking friends and the girls they get then erm, way to be positive! Firstly I know really good-looking guys who have zero confidence with women. But let’s just say there is a correlation between your friends who are good looking and your friends who are the most successful with women. I guess this means looks are the only thing that matters then right? OR MAYBE you could pay attention to the million other things that are going on.

Good-looking guys are likely to be way more confident. They’ve grown up getting any girl they wanted, why wouldn’t they be confident with girls? Why wouldn’t they just assume they’re good enough? Also, they’ll be much more comfortable around women. They’ll know how to talk to them in both a relaxed social way and in a more sexual way. They’ll know how to physically escalate things with a girl and won’t be afraid of doing so. This is the stuff that makes a difference, seriously, and none of it remotely requires you to be good-looking.

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