James Arden checks out the garage rockers latest album.
The Christian rock band from Brighton bring religion to the masses.
Recipe for modern R'n'B album: liberal helpings of guest rappers and an overdose of sexual euphemisms.
The judges are Helen Adams, Billy Goldring and Oli Warne, with Alex Fink compering.
Oli Warne opens in his own college, I think he's been to as many of these as me and sang (another) great set, including Dido's Thank You, a mind-blowing rendition of Eric Clapton's Tears in Heaven and he continued with what turned into an impromptu sing-a-long version of You're so Vain which put a very big smile on the faces of both the real panel, and the housemates' panel.
He followed with a beautiful version of my favourite song, and thus always a winner, Handbags and Gladrags, as well as When you say nothing at all. He's a stand-out act, and well worth a listen.
Next up is Stephano, an Italian gentleman. We've adopted our first Yorker male panelist who seems to have taken the role of Bitchy McBitchison, and said he "doesn't quite seem to understand the concept of singing into the mic" whilst Laura (Yes folks, she's here again!) said: "He's getting into it."
The second song, Bob Dylan's Like a Rolling Stone, our male described as a "tune" and that his Spanish accent works really well with Dylan - I'll take his word for it.
Stephano does however get 100% into it, with "his emotional head movements" (DG) and big smile half way through.
At this point I’d gone into a lot of detail about his remaining songs, but I had a technical issue and lost it all. So, in summary, we liked Stephano, he played I Wanna Be Like You from The Jungle Book as well as his signature Everybody Wants To Be a Cat and the judges like it. Oli Warne said: “I want to be a cat now.”
Al went for "a solid 8", the girls for a 7/10.
Luke Malkin is doing a comedy version of song (whilst having a minor set-back due to a problem with a battery and a guitar, my knowledge is stretched here). Male verdict is that it sounds a bit like Monty Python (although we don’t think it is) and his second was his own material, a song called Bide.
Housemates 1 and 2 added: “His shiny hair is almost as smooth as his voice” whilst the other “wants to take him home to meet my mum”.
His third song was by Leonard Cohen. Our panel think he sounds that he’s had training, or just has a fab voice. Either way, it’s a compliment. We like him.
The fourth is “a woo-ing song” (Laura) whilst our token male is still trying to find the right adjective (we’ll add it in later if he gets it).
The fifth is going to be a singalong with a rap in the middle. We’re a little sceptical. It turns out to be American Boy by Estelle. The girls' singalong was a bit lame – but in their defence, the song is very high – but the boys were much better, and the combination actually worked. Despite his reluctance, it might go down a bit better when people are drunk and sat around with a Pimms in their hands.
A unanimous 8/10 from our panel; of the comedy songs, “your last one was my favourite” from Billy, Helen liked his variation, whereas Oli teased with “I didn’t like it. I loved it”.
Dani performed a monologue – it’s the first one we’ve heard, so we’re waiting to see how it goes. It’s the last scene of Matilda if you’re familiar. She’s very charismatic, and if she wasn’t so petite I could imagine her actually being Ms Trunchball. It was the first one of its type, and we should have seen more.
Oli was “quite terrified for most it, but it was great”. Billy sounds quite terrified whilst Helen found it very enjoyable. Matt Oliver who walked in at the end was slightly confused as to why there was a variety of textbooks thrown on the floor and a terrified panel of judges.
Oli Warne accompanying Rob Furnival with Let It Be. It’s another one of those songs that if it’s heard at Woodstock every group of friends will hug, sing and be thankful to be there.
Half way through he grabs his Kazoo, which Al got very excited about. The girls think he’s “cute”. Oli (after calling himself handsome) said the singing was fabulous and his self-deprecation was not at all called for, he was fabulous.
Next up, Ned. After reviewing five of these I’m out of words, so over to Al, who said he’s “simple, threadbare, but very good”. DG’s gone for “it’s a bit folky” whereas Laura thinks it’s a bit “chillouty”. I think it's almost a bit too chilled for Woodstock – unless it’s at the end.
It’s another “tune” (by Al, who’s now getting fed up of me writing everything he says) of Simon and Garfunkel's Scarborough Fair. He forgot the words half way through, but still performed a gorgeously soulful rendition of a stunning song. Laura would like him to “sing her a lullaby”.
The girls went for 9/10, Al agreed, and Dave, our second male reviewer went for a controversial 7.
Now up, for a welcome break from guitar, we have a keyboard, played by Jamie Longstaffe. I should let you know that we had a conversation about men who are good with their hands. Jamie most certainly is, in the keyboard sense obviously.
Now the song we can’t put our finger on, but it’s the instrumental from Tupac (Al just named it as That’s Just The Way It Is). He looks decidedly unsure of himself, with no reasoning whatsoever as he’s a great musician.
Oli thought “it was great” while Helen described him as the “first distinctive keyboardist” and Laura, that he was “very masterful with his instrument”.
He should get through. We hope.
A blonde gentleman (who had dyed his hair “as part of Vanbrugh Solidarity”) called Ben Kirkby had a few tuning issues, and it was the second time we’ve heard this song in as many days, and Laura’s verdict was “it’s alright”.
The second, a Cat Stevens or Boyzone cover was a bit odd. His voice is almost too grungy to be performing a ballad.
The third, one of literally my all time favourite songs, Hallelujah, was (in Laura’s words) a "let-down". Overall, a good effort, but we’re a little unsure. The guitarist on the judges panel, Oli, said his guitar was “played perfectly”.
Alison Dickie, our male reviewer for the evening, and Dave Pearce take to the stage to perform what they say will be “slightly below par”. Why? We’re not sure either, but hell, that’s Al.
So, Al, mistakenly introduced as Alison (much to our amusement) and Dave performed a striking song, written by Al. Laura said “the song’s beautiful”. The pair, who are already performing at Woodstock, have an earthy vocal, and is only the second act whose CD I’d actually buy – and that’s not just because I know half of them.
Their second song, we were reliably told by Al, “is a cover, so you’ll probably like it more than the other”. It’s Arcade Fire and Rebecca. Al – you’re wrong, we prefer your own material to the second one.
The pair’s vocals intertwine perfectly, the harmonies work really well, and they both capture the attention of the room, which at an event like this is rare. The fact that half way through they swopped tact for a beat section on their guitars, which prompted spontaneous applause, only added to our admiration. I shall be moving myself and the group of us who will be at Woodstock for the full 12 hours to see this pair. You rocked my Sunday.
Billy said it was “awesome”, Oli said "you were tight", while Helen added, “they excelled themselves”.
(Ned can't actually make it so he's out, but did get special mention, as did Al and Dave who will already be playing.)
So, there we are, York’s Got Talent, and I never thought I’d say this, but it does. It’s been surprising. I went to the first one because no one on the Arts team could. I then dragged a variety of housemates to the rest (to who I owe a huge thankyou). The acts and the concept are both fabulous, so well done to all of them, and secondly Billy Goldring for the idea.
For a group who would never normally go along to a trendy open-mic night, it was nice to see York’s talent in a setting that even we could go along to. My only regret is this didn’t happen more than two weeks before I graduate, I feel I’ve actually missed out, and that’s a shame. So folks, get a group together, go to an open-mic night, be it your college or any other and support them, you never know you may see the next big thing, and if not, I guarantee you’ll have a great time.
Woodstock takes place Saturday, Week 9 at Vanbrugh Paradise
Thanks for your review 
(but just to let you know, Stephano's Italian, not Spanish)
Vanbrugh holds an informal Open-Mic night open to all colleges, every Sunday from 8.30pm in the JCR.
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