That Girl from Derwent dwells on the value of religion this Christmas.
That Girl from Derwent has learned a few more things about prejudice since moving up North.
That Girl From Derwent reckons if you're going to be offensive, you should find a better reason.
That Girl from Derwent considers why it is that some words have wider implications than others.
Depression is not a good experience; the name kind of gives it away. For those of you who haven’t experienced it, it reminds me of swimming very deep, and then struggling upwards as my oxygen runs out. My legs get heavier, it gets harder and harder, and the fear creeps in that I will never reach the open free air above.
My depression began when I came to University. There are a multitude of things behind it, none of them easily solved, and I felt trapped. I was living away from home for the first time, and so the stable family background I had taken for granted disappeared, and instead I was thrown into a world of new people - people I didn’t know, and therefore, in my mind, couldn’t really trust.
It’s not much fun to be the miserable one. When I’m particularly low, I tend to isolate myself; I don’t want to be around other people, because pretending to be happy is too much of an effort, and to burden these still new friends with how I was feeling was too much. Still in the stage where I was desperate for everyone to like me, telling them I felt like shutting myself in darkness ‘til the world ceased to exist wasn’t an appealing prospect.
This didn’t lend itself well to a Fresher’s lifestyle – spending night after night shut in your room instead of going out and appreciating the Uni’s own holy trinity (Tru, Ziggy’s and Gallery) made it hard to maintain new friendships. So when things began to pick up for me in the summer term, I really tried to relish this new side of uni, the side everyone else seemed to live.
Things could only go up from there, I was sure, as I started my second year at uni. Wrong. My problems worsened, and back in rushed the depression; out came the anti-depressants, but so did lots of scary thoughts that made me afraid to be left alone. I was desperate to find a solution; I wanted to have a normal life again.
Finally I realised, there is no such thing as a normal life; everyone deals with some kind of problem. It’s learning to cope with what you have. For me, the university's open door team really helped; I found someone I could talk to without burdening them, and ways to make my life at uni easier. I now attend a depression help group, and have tried lots of things, from meditation, to affirmations, to celebrating the tiniest victories: anything that helps lift me and get me through each day. And the most important thing I’ve learnt is how to find the humour in my situation, whether through the people I meet, or the awkward situations I end up in – and that’s what I want to share with all of you. I am writing this, not to belittle or mock depression, but to raise awareness, and to show people it’s ok to struggle; sooner or later we all do. The important thing is to always pick yourself up again.
Consider this my introduction; from now on my entries will show you just how funny my depressing life is – hey, if I can make you smile, you’ll have made my day.
Anyone who wants to seek help for depression can contact the Open Door team on 01904 432140, or e-mail at opendoor@york.ac.uk. For more information see http://www.york.ac.uk/student-support-services/open-door-team/
Fantastic to attempt to talk about these issues in more than just a one off feature. I think many people can associate themselves with the feelings described above. Thank you for sharing 
What a brilliant idea for a feature. Well done Hannah.
I've also noticed that finding humour in difficult times is the most effective remedy.
A case in point - myself, in the sink-hole of a serious low after getting 1st year grades back, devouring an entire bottle of single malt and consequently tripping over my own shoes to land in the box of recycling in our kitchen - somehow the sheer misery turned into laughter.
I'd like to point out that this article was not written or thought up by me, but thank you for your support #2! Kudos on the single malt though
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