You shall go to the ball

Alcuin winter ball 2006

Gossiping over whose boobs are falling out, whose dress looks hideous and who should have just stayed at home, is one of the main delights of the night. And this week The Look is here to ensure that you are not on the receiving end of such wicked comments by guiding you through the potential mine field that is Christmas ball dresses.

First off it seems necessary to establish a budget and seeing as it is highly probable that you are going to end up in the sweat/dirt pit that is Toffs, Ziggy’s or The Gallery, spending whatever paltry remnants of a student loan you have left on a beautiful but ridiculously overpriced dress is not the best of ideas.

Purple Sweetheart Dress, Warehouse, £80

you can, try to recycle something from last years outfit. In fact why not just wear the same thing? Formal fashions don’t tend to vary that much from year to year so chances are you can get away with it; in all likelihood anybody who might have witnessed your attire last year was probably too drunk to remember, so exploit this and save some cash.

If a wardrobe raid produces negative results and you have enough pennies to buy a new dress then you have two options. On the one hand you could go for the ever faithful black dress (normally I would be rallying against plain old black but seeing as it’s winter I’m willing to make a concession), on the other hand there is colour; I’m told dark purple and green are this season’s colours of choice.

Silk Organza Ruffled Tiered Dress, ASOS, £80

Either way there are some basic rules and warnings that should always be adhered to:

• Try to stay clear of high street stores such as Monsoon or Coast: you are not the only one who will have been seduced by their charms and chances are you will encounter at least half a dozen other people wearing the same dress as you.

• Don’t be deceived by the ‘it’s Christmas and therefore I must wear sparkles’ school of thought. I honestly cannot comprehend why some shops feel the need to only stock glittery gold and red dresses as soon as it gets to December. You are not a bauble.

• Wearing white is an error. An error which I paid for last Christmas when I spilt red wine everywhere. The dry-cleaning bill was not a pretty sight.

• Do not under any circumstances wear tinsel. This is not the school Christmas play and you are not a fairy.

Now you have the dress it’s time to think about the shoes and on this front The Look makes only one suggestion: never, ever, under any circumstances, take your shoes off! I don’t care how much they hurt, barefoot in Toffs is not a pleasant thought and although you may find momentary relief you will look like a drunken idiot.

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